Found Object

I slept through Pilates this morning and it really bothered me. To make up for it, I wrote an email to an advisor at UBC and left a message for my doctor. I hate leaving messages.

Then I went in the rain to get a passport document notarized in Kerrisdale. The lawer who signed it smelled strongly of smoke. He asked me in a bored voice if I solemly swore that everything in my document was true. It was, but the question took me off gaurd, so I said "Mmhmm". He probably rolled his eyes. There were paintings of Tuscany on the walls that were getting to me. It's depressing to see paintings of Tuscany in a Kerrisdale soliciter's office.

On the way out, I passed an abandoned pile of beige computer equipment in the emergency stairwell. There was a hulking keyboard with grey keys, and a tiny little grey screen that I liked. Whenever I see stuff left out like that, for someone to come and take away, I always spend a good minute thinking about what I might do with it. Even if it makes no sense, I always at least imagine I could want it, and take it home.

The only thing I don't do that with is wet couches. You know when people leave couches in the alley and it rains? Then the couch just bloats beside the dumpster for weeks, weighing a ton and starting to rot, and it's like a corpse, it really is. It's so revolting. I'm actually slightly fascinated by wet couches, but even I can't pretend I might want them for anything, ever.